Pencil Shavings

Sick Day

  My daughter is sick and there are so many reasons why this makes me feel sad. 

First there is her being sick.  It's so strange to see her curled up on the couch instead of twirling, dancing, singing, or even reading.  She just doesn't want to do anything.  She is normally so full of light and seeing her sick is so difficult.

Then there is her deep sadness at missing school.  There is really nothing that makes a parent happier than knowing that their kids love school.  She loves school so much that she cried this morning when she realized that a) she wasn't going to have perfect attendance this year, b) she was going to miss french class, c) she was going to miss the arts program toady.  I hurts my heart to see her sad.

Finally, just to prove that the apple doesn't fall far from the tree, I was very sad to realize that because she was staying home from school, I was too!  sigh....

We have done pretty well so far today.  It's been very quiet in the house, and she's rested a lot, and snacked a bit, and I really hope she feels better tomorrow (for both of our sakes)

Sometimes It's Too Much, But It's Really Never Too Much.

This weekend is one where I am seriously considering reevaluating my sanity.

What on earth was I thinking when I thought I could raise a family, go to school and keep up with my own interests?

My husband and I are celebrating our anniversary this weekend, it's not our anniversary yet, but it is when we are celebrating.  I have a test on Monday, on a book I read two months ago and now I'm struggling to remember the details of, so I'm re-reading in between working on my "space" project for 2D fundamentals class which is due on Tuesday.  That piece is 44x30 inches (not exactly tiny).  Also on Tuesday I have to submit my sketches for my next project for drawing class (for which I have done nothing and I am severely improverished on the idea front).  Also I have to get my first draft of an essay for my english class finished so I have time to figure out if I'm going in the right direction.

Add on to that the swimming, skating, and general kidness of my kids and I have my hands, heart, brain and schedule really full right now.

But, in a month I will be finished classes and likely at loose ends trying to figure out what to do with my time.  Funny how it seems I have so little now, and I know I will have too much then.

I'm not giving up, I will get through this crunch time, and I am still moving forward with The Postcard Project.  It would be easy to say that I won't do it anymore, it would be easy to say it's too much pressure on myself when I have so much else that demands my time.  But I can't, I love giving free gifts to strangers.  It is taking longer than I planned to get through the list, but I think it's worthwhile. I was telling my art professor about the project last week and he said it was a great idea, and he couldn't believe how inspired and generous it was.  I told him that there are one hundred people on the waiting list right now,  and progress is slow during the school term.  He said "It's a gift, people will understand, and be grateful."

And if they don't, well they don't.  I don't make any promises on delivery date, I just promise to fulfill my promise, hand making, hand writing, hand mailing an original piece of art to anyone in the world who asks.

I know that many people are surprised now when they get the cards, some have forgotten they even requested it, so the comments are fun when they get them.

Anyway, this was my break time from reading and drawing, and I have to put some more muscle balm on my aching hands, and I have to get back to work.

Do me a favour, can you make some more coffee for me?

A thousand million trillion cranes

We all feel the same, heart-sick, heart-broken, heart-aching for the people of Japan. I've been thinking about Sadako and the thousand paper cranes and the belief that wishes are granted to those who fold that many. Sadako Sasaki, two years old when the bomb was dropped near her home in Hiroshima, died of leukemia when she was almost 12, having folded 664 cranes, short of her goal of 1000. Her classmates finished for her.

via endlessknots.netage.com

This post speaks to my heart about the helplessness that we are all feeling, and the ache of human suffering we want to ease.  click the link above to see the whole post.

Also if you haven't given yet, it's never too late.  You can go to the Japan Relief page at CBC.ca (http://www.cbc.ca/japanrelief/) and choose from a number of ways to help and see the latest news about the disaster.

 

Bread and Circuses, and Charlie Sheen

Around 140 BC Roman politicians discovered that the best way to tame an unruly populous was to offer them cheap food and entertain them with bloody spectacles. The cheap food was bread or grains, the spectacle was violent chariot races called Circuses.

The people of Rome were easily distracted from the serious matters facing the Empire, by spectacular entertainment that often resulted in bloody painful deaths for the participants.

What does this have to do with Charlie Sheen?

It seems that we have not lost our taste for spectacular entertainment (and if there is a chance of the bloody death or at least metaphorical bloody death of the participant all the better) and we are still easily distracted from the serious nature of the times we are living in.

The world is in crisis. There are thousands of people dying right now as you read this. Some from natural disaster, some from illness, many from starvation, and some are being killed by their own governments because they dare to disagree.

And what are we doing?

We are busy being entertained.

The more serious the problems of our world become, the more we wish to eat our cheap food, and be entertained by the cheap spectacle. Why are we so determined to avoid facing the hard problems of our society? Why on earth would we care more about what Charlie Sheen is doing or saying, than about what we might do to help the people of Japan, New Zealand, Australia, Lybia, China, (and the list goes on)? I was shocked on the weekend to see that on Yahoo and Google Charlie Sheen was trending higher than the earthquake/tsunami/nuclear disaster that is assaulting Japan.

We still, obviously, live in a time of Bread and Circuses. I wonder, how long this need to be entertained going outstrip our humanity? When will we pull our heads out of our TV's and see the world for what it is. Or are we going to entertain ourselves past the point of rescue, and into oblivion?

The Ten Portraits Project

I have to have ten portraits finished in a few weeks, along with two more big panels like these ones.

I also have an essay and another art project for another class due in between.

I'm panicking a little.

As for the portraits, well I'll post them as they are finished.  I have done a few portraits over the years, I wish I could steal a few of those and put them in to ease the pressure, but, well you know, that would so wrong.

So instead I'm bribing my husband to pose for me.  This should be interesting.